Rangers Banter Archive August 12 2018
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12 Aug 2018 22:43:31
Coulibaly was bitten by the most toxic snake in the world, After 3 days of excruciating pain the snake died.
When Graeme Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 4 missed calls from Coulibaly.
Coulibaly doesn't do press ups. he pushes the world down.
Coulibaly fell into a pit of deadly cobras and came out wearing a pair of snake skin boots.
When Coulibaly turned 18. his maw n da moved out.
Katic can kick the ball 80 metres. Coulibaly can kick Katic further.
12 Aug 2018 23:35:39
4 missed calls 😂😂.
12 Aug 2018 23:48:25
Coulibaly doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone.
Before the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his wadrobe for Coulibaly.
Coulibaly can make onions cry!
When Coulibaly enters a room, he doesn't turn the light on, he turns the dark off.
If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Coulibaly says its beef, then it's beef.
Kids p*ss their names into snow. Coulibaly p*sses his name into tarmac.
Coulibaly doesn't sleep. He waits!
Coulibaly can tackle you so hard that it actually alters your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their shins and shout "What The f*** was That? "
13 Aug 2018 07:07:36
Coullibaly squeezes the lemon juice oot ae an orange.
13 Aug 2018 08:27:17
Der goalie
Sure the snake one was said on a film about chuck Norris?
{Ed001's Note - they are all old Chuck Norris jokes from when the internet was young. There was even a thing where if you typed 'Chuck Norris' in Google search it took you to a page that just said: "Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Your search - Chuck Norris - did not match any documents.
Suggestions:
Run, before he finds you.
Try a different person.
Try someone less dangerous.
13 Aug 2018 11:22:57
When Coulibaly goes for a operation he has to count back from 3 days ago.
12 Aug 2018 21:32:12
A few points from todays game.
Borna Barisic played like an establish player his delivery from set plays/ crosses was quality.
Goldson was a mountain and took his goal well.
It was a red card. At the time i thought a yellow but watching the replay it was a red.
The ref was rotten for both teams. Scottish refs are just a poor standard and it effects all teams up and down the country every week.
Gerrard is tactically astute and knows when to change things.
Kent and ejaria have loads of potential. They gave the ball away cheaply at times but they are brave and will improve.
Morales bullied their backline and got his goal if he continues with this form who knows what we could sell him for.
The positivity and mood around ibrox and between fans is great and long may it continue.
12 Aug 2018 22:15:19
Feel sorry for big Sadiq. Looks like he's trying too hard when he gets on.
12 Aug 2018 22:29:23
Poetry.
12 Aug 2018 22:54:10
I agree with the red card, at first I thought it was another wrong decision but after seeing it again I still think it was a little soft and should have been a yellow but I can't really complain about the red either, I'd have been shouting for a red if that foul happened against us.
Ejaria is someone I'm still 50 50 on, he looks a bit of quality, skillful and can pick out a pass but I also think he holds on to the ball a little too much, at Aberdeen it was his mistake that led to the goal but I'm remaining positive.
This is the first time in a long time I've been positive and looking forward to games, before this I'd almost be dreading the next game coming up. it's amazing what happens when we have a team that works hard and defenders who can actually defend.
13 Aug 2018 00:07:50
We shouldn't be looking to sell Morelos unless there is a good bid We want to keep him providing he also wants to stay
He's playing superbly just now.
13 Aug 2018 00:09:38
Sometimes Ejaria and, to some extent, Kent, play like academy players because it wasn't that long ago that's what they were. They are already looking a bit better every game and if that progress continues we'll have two cracking players this season.
13 Aug 2018 00:36:36
Rfc-chris, I will never understand the fascination that some fans have with how much we can sell players for. We should be trying to assemble the best squad we can afford and only be looking to sell the ones surplus to requirements.
I appreciate that we (like 99.9%) of clubs are a selling club and one day Alfredo will leave but u til then I couldn't care less at how much someone may or may not pay for him. Until he does go all I'm concerned Bout is how well he plays!
Maybe it's just me though?
13 Aug 2018 03:19:20
Ejaria seems to play in a 5-10 yard radius. If you aren't in that the he can't see you nd can't pass to you. Likes his wee flicks and stuff but sometimes you just need to make the safe pass.
13 Aug 2018 10:33:03
Zikos i understand your point. I just want Morales to keep doing what he's doing. he's a handful for any defence. I read a story somewhere that Morales joined Rangers as a stepping stone to more money and to play in a better league. I will enjoy watching him while we have him but in the end we might have to see him go. When that time comes we can expect good money for him.
12 Aug 2018 21:16:09
FF saying Wallace plus £400k for Lafferty and to be concluded this week?
12 Aug 2018 22:22:20
no chance why would they want wallace, they will screw us for as much as they can get, got walker written all over it.
12 Aug 2018 22:50:03
Would love lafferty back. He will hit the ground running if he comes back to us. Should never have went to hearts in the first place.
12 Aug 2018 23:40:32
Wallace won't play. Barasic and flanagan will play LB before wallace does. Wallace will be on a good wage aswell so getting shot of wallace for lafferty makes sense, plus the 400k is a bit steep, but I say go for it👍.
13 Aug 2018 00:10:47
Cash plus Wallace offer has been knocked back, I'm hearing.
13 Aug 2018 08:30:00
Why would Hearts want a player who hasn’t played for almost a year?
12 Aug 2018 20:50:18
Just watched SG interview after the game.
As ever very positive and professional.
However, hope everyone noticed there were NO Sports Direct lgos on the backboard?
Think something happening!
13 Aug 2018 09:24:28
Bar 72 contract expired 31 July. Hopefully new deal won’t men signage going back up.
12 Aug 2018 20:23:45
The buzz is back having been lost for last few years. Can’t wait till next game and getting new top for first time since fat boy come along.
12 Aug 2018 20:18:18
Listen I know it's early days but I'm excited with this team but even more so the manager speaks brilliantly he knows what's expected of a club rangers size I think it might be our year Mon the gers.
12 Aug 2018 18:16:21
Champions league your havin a laff! Champions league your havin a laff! 😂🤣 Spl. 🤔.
12 Aug 2018 18:03:27
I've decided I'm getting Coulibaly on the back of my new top.
12 Aug 2018 18:42:58
Av decided am getting Coulibaly tattooed on me back.
12 Aug 2018 18:50:10
Like the big man but find it strange full grown men with players names on tops lol.
12 Aug 2018 19:00:25
Don’t Molsgoals he will cover it! 😂😂.
12 Aug 2018 19:07:18
It's a matter of choice every letter and number is more money for the club.
12 Aug 2018 20:24:23
I know mate I just don't get it fair enough on kids tops just my opinion 😉.
12 Aug 2018 21:41:18
kids tops aren't big enough for his name lol.
12 Aug 2018 22:03:31
Are you confident the tops will be out before his season long loan ends?
13 Aug 2018 01:21:58
Billy smarts circus Big top isn’t big enough for his name.
12 Aug 2018 17:44:02
ross mcormack leaving villa for nothing. he was on our books if I am correct one point.
12 Aug 2018 18:17:23
Aye he was but the boy has been trouble anywhere he's been after he left us! Causes unrest in the dressing room and doesn't show for training!
As much as he's a no bad player I don't think he'd fit to what SG is building!
12 Aug 2018 19:51:56
When he left us he declared his undying love for Celtic. No thanks.
13 Aug 2018 04:32:49
36th you're spot on, know his cousins from clydebank, whole family are selik daft.
12 Aug 2018 17:38:29
I wish the refs would stop giving teams a chance against us lol honestly think that could have been a cricket score today 11 v 11. Tbh it was a definitely red tho.
12 Aug 2018 19:45:55
Stone wall red, took one for the team. Even after the sending off we bossed it. We are a massive threat from a set piece, very refreshing. Some left peg barasic has. All looking good👍.
13 Aug 2018 01:25:07
cannot wait to see us finish a league game with 11 men. down to nine the day and still looked like scoring.
12 Aug 2018 17:32:57
Red défo. took one for the team and he will learn from it.
12 Aug 2018 17:29:31
hi bears any word on coulibally? didt see the game i just heard he went off injured? and also noticed that st mirren had 4 players book? against 10 me? really? nice tactics mr stubbs!
12 Aug 2018 17:29:06
Anyone know why Arfield wasn't in the squad today?
12 Aug 2018 18:06:12
rested for thursday.
12 Aug 2018 18:13:58
Rested, I read. As far as the match today is concerned, firstly I must mention the fan display. awesome. Was in Sandy Jardine, so didn't see that one, obviously! St. Mirren fans were clearly delighted at sending off, forgetting they can beat us even when we have 9 men!
12 Aug 2018 19:37:25
Aye we rest a few for midweek and win our game with 10 men. I saw a celtic fan on the hotline basically saying Brenda played the reserves against hearts and it's cost them points . . . . Eh no most of them were brendas 1st choice in their position bar 3, they are starting to panic that we might be on our way back lol.
12 Aug 2018 17:14:26
job done today-now bring on maribor.
12 Aug 2018 20:38:45
Careful! They won 5 0 today!
12 Aug 2018 21:15:31
Osijek won 4-1 before they played us in the second leg so them winning 5-0 means hee haw.
12 Aug 2018 21:43:27
think if we had 11 men on the park might have been a similar score.
12 Aug 2018 17:03:17
What a game I think Rangers did great apart from not working together most of the match Stevie G has to teach them how to work together and pull their socks up for next week against Motherwell if they work together they can take this season by storm and make Celtic lose their winning streak. COME ON GERS.
12 Aug 2018 18:18:30
Not work together? Careful shauny son they do nothing but work together. are you sure it was the Rangers you were streaming and not the power rangers or pepa pig and his family? Or do you mean they don’t work together in Asda after the game.? Go and watch a rerun son.
12 Aug 2018 18:29:46
Shauny? Are you on the laughing water what a stupid post.
12 Aug 2018 19:33:35
Shauny is a sheep.
12 Aug 2018 19:35:28
We’re no playing Motherwell next week.
12 Aug 2018 15:55:48
Connor you are definitely Gold Son.
12 Aug 2018 16:24:27
Disagree what’s that all about cannot please some folk.
12 Aug 2018 17:18:19
Silent tim mate that's all. They'll still be hovering about the disagrees just won't be posting as there all watching the Gerrard revolution in fear fae the backa of the couch. We're coming for you timmy x.
12 Aug 2018 17:44:21
It’s funny that when things are going a bit better for us you don’t hear from timalloy and hibsgonk? 😭🇬🇧.
12 Aug 2018 15:47:13
Stupid there by McCrorie Can't complain about the sending off last man!
No doubt much to the delight of the Referee!
C'mon the Gers!
12 Aug 2018 15:54:53
100% red poor ball by beresic and terrible touch by murphy put him in trouble though, for me murphy needs to up his game.
12 Aug 2018 18:21:31
Beresic is BERILLIANTIC. Big welcome my friend you are going to be massive.
12 Aug 2018 15:47:11
Another red card today its not just the teams we're up against its the officials and the whole sfa they want to keep us down but not this year we will prove every 1 wrong title is our and shut the rest of Scottish football up that the people are back.
12 Aug 2018 15:50:57
I don't think we can feel too hard done by on that one, silly by McCrorie, no need to go to ground.
12 Aug 2018 15:53:35
The referee is Don Robertson ex St Mirren player should we expect any less?
12 Aug 2018 17:04:38
Get real guys, it was a clear red!
12 Aug 2018 18:03:12
It was a RED ALL DAY LONG, MURPHY AND BARISIC TO BLAME FOR RM NEEDING TO MAKE THAT CHALLENGE.
12 Aug 2018 15:28:54
25 minutes in and you can already see the class of Barisic.
12 Aug 2018 17:17:29
Good debut by barisic, slotted straight in. Good display after the red card, we are looking more like a team than last year. If el buffalo keeps listening to the boss, I think he will turn him into a hell of a player. No real weak spots in the team today, its obvious that gerrards work ethic is being listened to, no slackers, onward and upwards! Do you think we should play practice matches with 10 men!
12 Aug 2018 15:22:43
Just seen big Morelos scoring against The Mirren. SG obviously turning him into a player.
12 Aug 2018 15:53:24
He was always a player. Just needs confidence.
12 Aug 2018 16:07:38
He was always a player? He done nothing but take crap from certain segments.
12 Aug 2018 15:06:30
Tom Miller. byorna birishic, useless commentator.
12 Aug 2018 17:17:24
Awful
Worst commentator I've ever heard.
12 Aug 2018 20:00:17
I thought it was just me that couldn't take tom miller, terrible commentator. I turn the volume down when watching the highlights, can't stand his voice.
12 Aug 2018 22:23:46
Not to mention Hugh constantly calling Morelos, Morales, I don't see what's so difficult.
12 Aug 2018 15:16:08
Does anybody have a link to watch the game?
12 Aug 2018 15:37:55
Go on YouTube.
12 Aug 2018 14:25:46
Tav on the bench today. No doubt being rested for midweek?
12 Aug 2018 14:45:29
Hodson on bench as well, so that means he's not gone!
12 Aug 2018 13:15:01
Looking back on Joey barton situation you realise he was totally in the right. He was easily the best player we had at the time (although I understand he struggled to get up to pace with the scottish game) and I think he would of been a good player for us even if it was just for that season. The team were terrible at the time and I can understand his frustration. Signing him was warbs downfall as he had no man management at all! Stevie g would of kept him grounded. Never mind. We have a much better squad now and the boots are shaking over the east side. Hopefully a convincing win today and we'll be ahead in the league! Things are looking up. #55 #letsgo.
12 Aug 2018 14:13:02
terrible post joey barton was more interested in his twitter profile and his media profile. didn't see him pull up any trees in scotland. totaly underated it, all i got was barton gobbing off what he was going to do scotland. what did he do. sent back down south with tail between legs. messiah he wasnt. london jock.
12 Aug 2018 14:33:03
Joey barton was easily the worst signing we have made in recent years.
12 Aug 2018 14:54:43
to the people who pressed disagree on joey barton, tell me why he was a success. gobby loud mouthed yob. london jock.
12 Aug 2018 17:18:41
Well what happened to warbs? And what happened to the team? He was sacked and the team were maulled by celtic and the rest!
12 Aug 2018 18:25:51
No even a concrete suit made by the late arfur Thomson could have kept Joey i'm really Jesus in disguise grounded. No right in the heed am afraid.
12 Aug 2018 12:05:09
Can't get to Ibrox today so it's Rtv for me. C'mon the famous 🔴⚪️🔵.
12 Aug 2018 11:45:17
Just looking at some stats.
11 games since last old firm game
0 defeats
24 goals scored
9 against incl Hibs 5-5 each game
Pretty decent, I know there's a couple of pre season in there but still.
12 Aug 2018 12:10:34
Your the stat man ander brill.
12 Aug 2018 11:34:56
Went out lastnight, hammered and now I'm so ill, down and miserable, but then it springs to mind that the mighty rangers are playing today and suddenly life ain't so bad! Come on Rangers let's smash this mob today! 🔴⚪🔵.
12 Aug 2018 12:06:51
You forgot the best bit, the imminent melt do.
12 Aug 2018 12:09:23
You forgot the imminent melt down of the sun tanned one, add a smile to the most miserable today that would. 5-0 Rangers today #lets go.
12 Aug 2018 12:52:52
Yes mate I'm hoping for a tasty result today, and yes the timplosion is always imminent lol love be8ng a bear!
12 Aug 2018 11:09:39
We require a good result today to keep our good run going and getting ahead of THEM on points. I would like to see our new Croatian playing left back. I think he is class.
keep it going Rangers.
12 Aug 2018 12:16:14
Yip spot in . Am going to the football and going to get soaked but al be “SINGIN IN THE RAIN. AM “SINGIN IN THE RAiN WHAT A GLORIOUS FEELIN. AM HAPPY AGAIN’
Love you Stevie.
12 Aug 2018 12:46:55
It doesn't matter by how much we win As long as we win.
12 Aug 2018 10:08:36
It's Rangers time again folks and it's Follow we will. When was the last time we were on a massive high and they were on a bit of a downer? How many times have we seen previous Rangers teams in situations like today only to blow it and let us all down? You just know that this side ain't going to do that. Today will be made that little bit sweeter, knowing that it's a Mr Alan Stubbs in the opposite dugout. let's go 🇬🇧.
12 Aug 2018 10:42:08
Get them pumped and send out a message. If you come to Ibrox you will be dominated and leave with nothing. LET'S GO.
12 Aug 2018 10:56:47
No we won't be blowing it today or on Thursday. I see the bookies have clipped our odds for winning the league and while I still believe that might be beyond us at last we seem to be moving in the right direction while our rivals, Celtic, Hibs and Aberdeen all seem to be going backwards or standing still.
12 Aug 2018 09:59:59
I know victimisation and paranoia is imminent but Bhampot please rise this isn't fun without you.
12 Aug 2018 10:01:43
{Ed's Note - Reid the Red has posted a new article entitled, Premier League Matches Preview 12 August 2018
12 Aug 2018 09:46:57
I would sign big kyle and that Peter haring guy looks good with the ball for a defender bossed that midfield for hearts against them.
12 Aug 2018 11:03:53
Why is it that we have to go out and sign every player who plays against us? I'd take Lafferty if nobody else is available as a squad player. I still think Solanke will happen before the end of August and we've got loads of midfield players including Rossiter and Dorrans to come back.
12 Aug 2018 15:13:13
Does anybody have a link to watch the game?
12 Aug 2018 09:04:06
Definately wanting Kyle Lafferty @Rangers 4 out of 4 He is proving to be a thorn in the side against Celtic N9 more than £500,000
Hopefully We can get CB Jack Simpson from Bournemouth aswell
That just leaves a creative midfielder to try get before the 3 weeks are out
Hopefully by end of August there will be the announcement that we will be allowed to buy shirts knowing most merchandise is going into the Clubs coffers #hummel50/ 50deal #JDSports50/ 50deal #MASHcanbeatit.
12 Aug 2018 12:01:25
Yesterday you said "lafferty might have enough quality for the spl" you even questioned how many goals he would score for us and you tried to take the shine off his goal tally last year by stating these were across all competitions. Now you are shouting from the roof tops that we should sign lafferty. There is definately a want about you🙃.
12 Aug 2018 12:17:32
Shut up you Your giving is a splitting heedache! 😂😂.
12 Aug 2018 12:18:30
M8 Kazmania is anything but consistent in posting. Telling people to calm down and has been carried away for weeks!
12 Aug 2018 12:20:01
FYI I was saying he is good for rye SPL as knows the game from the back of his hand I still think he's a squad player but the fact that he scores against Celtic most often then not he needs to be jumping ship to us! Are you awright now Coldo yeh Tim 😜😂.
12 Aug 2018 12:53:39
Kaz will have a meltdown shortly, am just playing with you mate😂👍.
12 Aug 2018 12:53:48
I'm not going to lie I am excited I see good things happening with OUR club It's about time! We all deserve to be happy supporting the best team in the land 👍🏼Don't worry I will calm down guys Just loving the mighty Gers the now 👍🏼.
12 Aug 2018 13:09:17
I don't mind a laugh and a joke kaz, but calling folk tims, that's out of order😉😂👍.
12 Aug 2018 13:24:24
🎣🎣🎣😜😂 Sorry Coldo I will stop swearing at you 👍🏼
C'mon the Gers 💙.
12 Aug 2018 08:58:27
Congratulations to Hearts and Big Kyle. Early days but Hearts might prove to be our friends when it comes to taking points of Celtic and hibs. Let's hope lafferty comes in and maybe Moult in January . LET'S GO!
12 Aug 2018 09:34:11
For the life of me I can't understand what some posters see in moult, could someone please explain.
12 Aug 2018 09:50:41
Why does any Rangers fan think getting moult is the way ahead for Rangers! Can’t get a game for Preston NE but yet some fans reckon he’s the answer for Rangers. We have a great opportunity this season because Pacific Shelf 595 are on the verge of a timplosion and signing players like moult instead of going for the likes of solanke or isn’t the way ahead I’m sorry.
12 Aug 2018 11:37:04
I'm sure we felt similar when boyd was being signed? Look how he turned out! Good service and moult could RIP it up here, but do I personally want him? Nope, just think he would be successful playing for us.
12 Aug 2018 20:28:54
I liked Louis Moult and would have taken him at the start of the summer but now we can see what direction we r moving in Moult is nowhere near the standard required, I'm suprised just how good we look if I'm being honest.
12 Aug 2018 08:53:01
The most important thing is what happens on the park never mind fat baws!
He'll be gone for good real soon and we will be a very successful club again
Like I said, anything he touches he poisons!
C'mon Rangers and Gerrard #LetsDoThis💙.
12 Aug 2018 17:29:54
Anything he touches he makes a fortune. Everything is about money for him he should have never been let in the door in the first place it's not him to blame it's the the likes of green n Whyte who gave him the opportunity to get his greedy mitts in the door in first place and the people who are constautly telling us we are rid of him only to give him a chance to get back in the door by messing up contracts.
12 Aug 2018 08:02:28
Other than RTV. Does anyone else know of any channels showing the game? Cheers.
12 Aug 2018 10:10:45
Only on Rtv.
12 Aug 2018 07:29:09
{Ed's Note - Ed001 has posted a new article entitled, Review Of The Day 12th August 2018
12 Aug 2018 01:37:15
Does anyone know if the rangers teddy bears club is still going? Used to be a wee thing for kids where you got a birthday card, a wee activity pack and chance to be a mascot amongst other things. Can't see anything on the website.
12 Aug 2018 09:19:18
how can anyone disagree with stuarts post (numpties)
12 Aug 2018 09:48:50
I don’t think so Stuart. I actually forgot all about it. They should definitely bring it back if it’s gone!
12 Aug 2018 09:53:51
Will be the usual 2 who disagree with everything.
12 Aug 2018 11:32:20
Aye definitely need to bring it back. Wonder why umit was stopped. Was hoping to. Get my two wee boys joined up.
12 Aug 2018
New image uploaded to the
Rangers Player Sightings page entitled, Germinado
